Tracking my weight, attitude, level of pain, Energy, and the general gist of the day.

13FEB19 | WT:? | ATT:9 | PAIN: 3 | NRG: 6 | POST OP DAY ONE  Doing well.  Low pain (good drugs) Yesterday’s surgery lasted 7 hours, but was (seemingly) successful.  I was able to get up and walk around (with all my attachments.)  This is going to be weird, but my attitude is good and I just can’t get over the outpouring of love and support from everyone.  They have me on a liquid diet, which is terrible, so we will see how long that lasts.  Should be in hospital till Sunday.

13FEB19|Wt:215|ATT:8|PAIN:0|NRG:8| SURGERY DAY (First off I am missing a few posts here that I need to figure out.) Weird.  Up early to face this day.  Regardless of how things go, my life, my body and my spirit will never be the same.  I face my foe with the most drastic weapon I have- surgery.  The surgeon is going to try and keep the hole and connect things back together.  I will have a temporary bag for a couple months and then they will turn the plumbing back on.  Then a clean up round of chemo, which will probably take my luxurious hair.  I am not good at waiting, and am glad to be getting this over with.  Thanks for supporting me.  I will post more soon.

31JAN19|Wt:216|ATT:10|PAIN:0|NRG:9| THE HOLE STAYS We met with the surgeon today and he said that the radiation and chemo were so effective that I shouldn’t have to have a permanent bag.  I literally can’t tell you how happy I was to hear that!!  Surgery date set for 13FEB, then we go from here.  Crazy happy right now.  Now I need to prepare my business to run without me for a while.

22DEC18|Wt:211|ATT:8|PAIN:8|NRG:3| DAY #46– Done!! I finished both my chemo regimen and daily radiation treatments this week! They said the pain will get worse before it gets better and it will be a couple weeks before its all gone.  As the burns start to heal inside and outside things will slowly normalize.  The Dr. asked me if I was taking it easy at work and I was like, um: I’m a caterer, and it’s December… so no taking it easy.  80 hour weeks from Thanksgiving to Christmas, and today is my first day relaxing on the couch.  It’s going to be a weird transition from every-single-day treatments & a crushing work schedule to literally nothing to do for 10 days.  Kinda looking forward to it.

15DEC18|Wt:210|ATT:6|PAIN:8|NRG:5| DAY #39– So close!  1 more day of chemo and then radiation is over next Thursday!  These are our busiest 2 weeks of the year, which happen to exactly coincide with the hardest 2 weeks of my chemo/radiation, so every day is a mental committment to making it happen .  The pain is super sharp, but its all from the radiation and comes and goes.  I can see the first milestone of this triathlon and am looking forward to a break in between heats.

7DEC18|Wt:211|ATT:8|PAIN:5|NRG:8| DAY #31– They said most of my side effects would accumulate towards the last half of treatment and they weren’t kidding.  Not to get too specific, but I feel like I have been on a horse for a week, in the summer, without changing my drawers.  Feel like that oughta give a solid word picture of what I am dealing with.  Internally the chemo/radiation are spectacularly successful, it’s just external right now.  a couple more weeks of this and then a month of rest before the big surgery.

30NOV18|Wt:209|ATT:8|PAIN:2|NRG:6| DAY #24– I AM HALFWAY THROUGH THE CHEMO/RADIATION!!  This in no way is halfway through my journey, but it’s good to have milestones.  SO MUCH PROGRESS !!  From how I presented back in August to today is such a huge leap.  VERY ENCOURAGED!

28NOV18|Wt:208|ATT:8|PAIN:4|NRG:6| DAY #22– I am realizing that I have a limit on what I can get done these days.  Prior to the treatments I would work 16 hour days and just go and go & now there is a point where my body just says “nope” and that’s a challenge for me to deal with.  Had a break from the treatments over the holiday and got back on it this Monday.  A new little pain has surfaced that I will bring up with the Drs tomorrow. Overall still doing well with a good attitude. and glad to be a little over 1/3 of the way through the chemo/radiation treatments.

22NOV18|Wt:210|ATT:09|PAIN:1|NRG:5| DAY #15– Spent the past week on our Thanksgiving sales.  Over 200 Turkeys & hams and sides is a pretty big production and takes a lot of time.  After all these years it is still a veery manual process, and I have less energy every day, so one of the things I am thankful for is a few days break from not only work, but chemo and radiation.  It all picks back up on Monday, but for now I am fortunate to get some couch time.  Woke up early this morning to light my smoker for our turkey and just had a moment where I was overwhelmed with gratitude for everything.  

16NOV18|Wt:210|ATT:08|PAIN:2|NRG:6| DAY #9– Feeling good, working hard.  I tend to crap out about 4pm every day, so that’s a new “normal” Trying to get to all my thank you cards but by the time I can sit down to write them, I just need to rest.  I promise I will get them out soon!!

15NOV18|Wt:211|ATT:08|PAIN:2|NRG:7| DAY #8– Spent half a day cranking out catering and half a day at Texas Oncology.  2 Dr’s visits/followups, transfusion, radiation.  Lot’s of ground covered, but responding well to treatment.

14NOV18|Wt:210|ATT:09|PAIN:2|NRG:6| DAY #7– Noticing the difference when I “make”.  Not sure if it’s optimism or not, but things are objectively different.  Turkey sales are crazy this year and ready for the big “push.”

13NOV18|Wt:211|ATT:09|PAIN:2|NRG:7| DAY #6– Still can’t get over last night!  Feel good, and started what is going to be a long week and a half of catering.

12NOV18|Wt:212|ATT:10|PAIN:2|NRG:9| DAY #5– The entire rest of the day was eclipsed by the benefit that was thrown in my honor this evening.  300 people came out to support me on this journey and love on me; I am humbled, honored and blessed.  In a rare instance for me, I am speechless. 

11NOV18|Wt:212|ATT:9|PAIN:2|NRG:8| DAY #4– Worked for a bit but was able to relax and build up some energy.  Feeling good with surprisingly no pain.  Not sure that the chemo/radiation could take hold that quickly, but I will stay optimistic about it.

10NOV18|Wt:213|ATT:7|PAIN:4|NRG:7| DAY #3– Crazy long day of work.  It’s an off day for chemo/radiation (taking them m-f only) but we had a number of events to get out.  Feeling pretty good and my energy held out well.

9NOV18|Wt:214|ATT:8|PAIN:7|NRG:6| DAY #2– Getting into the swing of taking all the pills and making it to Willowbrook every day for radiation and misc appts while still running a business.  I think my greatest anxiety right now comes from my business more than the cancer.  I can’t just walk away from it and there no one to hand it over to while I am going through this, so I’m still working 70-80 hours around all this medical stuff.  Praying for the energy, a clear mind, and to find moments where I can rest and heal.

8NOV18|Wt:215|ATT:6|PAIN:7|NRG:5| DAY #1– Chemo pills, blood transfusion, iron infusion & radiation today. Kind of a lot to take in and it got into my head a bit.  I am glad to get started and I just feel grateful for my absolutely amazing support group and the prayer warriors  who are lifting me up on a continual basis.

7NOV18|Wt:216|ATT:7|PAIN:7|NRG:5| Drs appt, finalized the meds, wen’t over a few things and picked up my chemo.  It came disguised as a couple of pill bottles, but it means so much more.  Tomorrow is day 1.

6NOV18|Wt:215|ATT:8|PAIN:7|NRG:5| Everything is scheduled and ready to go.  PET Scan today ( not nearly as bad as an MRI, plus I made a new friend: Mr. Atavan!) Getting ready for the Thanksgiving madness at work and a few details before I start my treatments.

5NOV18|Wt:216|ATT:8|PAIN:7|NRG:5| Dr. scheduled a transfusion and iron injection for me this week due to the amount of blood I’ve lost.  We are hoping that helps with the energy issues.  Also expecting to get started on the chemo/radiation this week. Super long day at work that includes a Ted Cruz rally at one of our restaurants.  Pretty impressed at the enthusiasm in the room as well as Sen Cruz’s double decker bus!  (See insta)

4NOV18|Wt:215|ATT:8|PAIN:6|NRG:4| Planted garlic for the first time and worked in my gardens.  I find a lot of peace with my hands in the dirt.  Feeling kind of run down but with a good attitude.

3NOV18|Wt:213|ATT:8|PAIN:4|NRG:7| Excited to have an actual weekend off like a normal person!  Think it’s the last one of the year though. Great weather and looking forward to getting some projects done.

2NOV18|Wt:214|ATT:7|PAIN:7|NRG:5| Kind of a tough day and I just am not sure why.  Super productive at work but it was a long long day.  Grumpy from dealing with insurance and Drs billing people.  Going to turn tomorrow around!

1NOV18|Wt:215|ATT:9|PAIN:6|NRG:5| Felt really run down today, but got a lot done at work.  Lost some jobs because the rain washed out the venues.

31OCT18|Wt:216|ATT:8|PAIN:7|NRG:7| Met with the Radio Oncologist today and feel like we are super close to getting going.  Another great Dr. who loves what she does. CRAZY storm and Trick Or Treat drama tonight. I love the people around me! CLICK HERE FOR DEETS

30OCT18|Wt:215|ATT:8|PAIN:7|NRG:9| Enjoyed a beautiful day off.  I mean, I literally am NEVER off, but I worked from home and had plenty of time for little projects like some photography (see my insta) and putting together a new journal & binder for the HUGE amount of info we are collecting on this journey.  Lots of pain today and I KNOW I have many worse days ahead of me before I am through it, but it’s been tough to deal with.

29OCT18|Wt:215|ATT:8|PAIN:5|NRG:8| FINALLY met w the oncologist who we liked very much.  She got things in motion and after we meet with the RadioOncologist on Wednesday we should have a start date for the program.  Looking like it’s going to start 12NOV.  Glad to start seeing progress.  CLICK HERE FOR DEETS

28OCT18|Wt:214|ATT:7|PAIN:5|NRG:6| Beautiful day.  Moderate amount of pain at the end of the day but overall felt great and met with an old guy that had beaten cancer a few times.

27OCT18|Wt:214|ATT:7|PAIN:3|NRG:7| Posted about the benefit this morning then catered for a benefit later in the day.  So much love going around in this community and I am honored to not only be able to contribute to others’ events, but to also feel the love flowing back.  Learning that I don’t have the stamina to pull off the long days I used to before this situation occurred.

26OCT18|Wt:214|ATT:6|PAIN:4|NRG:6| Very distracted with my thoughts today and “lost” my catering van.  Funny story in my Twitter. It’s been a long week of long days, and thinking I am going to get another tattoo before they tell me I can’t.

25OCT18|Wt:215|ATT:6|PAIN:3|NRG:7| Met w surgeon today and got the referrals to oncologist, etc.  For some reason the gravity of everything crashed on me hard and it was kind of an emotional day. #savethehole CLICK HERE FOR DEETS

24OCT18|Wt:216|ATT:9|PAIN:4|NRG:8| HIGHLY productive today!  Got my vote on (if you don’t vote, you can’t complain) and worked on some Fall projects at work.  Drs appt tomorrow and hope we get a plan together.

23OCT18|Wt:216|ATT:9|PAIN:4|NRG:8| The pain is kind of changing a bit (hard to explain but it changes a lot & comes and goes as well) and I am just anxious to get the plan and get moving.  I am a fixer, and waiting is hard.  Solid day back at work with a long week ahead of me.

22OCT18|Wt:217|ATT:10|PAIN:4|NRG:9| I was disappointed that my Drs appointment got moved to Thursday, but sometimes that’s how it goes.  I just want the plan figured out so I can start seeing the path ahead of me.  Solid day at work and finished it with my son’s excellent portrayal of Konstantin in The Seagull.

21OCT18|Wt:217|ATT:10|PAIN:2|NRG:10| I am so relaxed and focused after my Epic Roadie from Seattle to Cypress with my oldest son.  I will post about the trip tomorrow with pictures, but my goals were achieved and now I am ready to get to the getting. Tomorrow is my appointment to review the MRI and to start putting the treatment plan together.


12OCT18|Wt:219|ATT:9|PAIN:3|NRG:8| Got the MRI today and it was the worst.  I am viciously claustrophobic and it was torture.  Jennisa and company are planning a benefit.  Tomorrow I am leaving on an epic trip/vision quest that was providently planned before cancer was even on the radar.  I am looking for inspiration, connection to God and clarity about the path ahead.  I always find God walking in the mountains.

11OCT18|Wt:218|ATT:7|PAIN:2|NRG:8| Finally got the MRI scheduled (tomorrow) and some meds to deal with this intermittent pain.  Friends are planning a benefit for us and we really are overwhelmed with the love pouring out.

10OCT18|Wt:218|ATT:9|PAIN:1|NRG:8| Good day at work.  Still chasing an MRI appt.  Getting ready for my epic roadie next week!

9OCT18|Wt:217|ATT:8|PAIN:2|NRG:6| Buoyed by the love and support of my friends.  Have a few long days at work and getting a bit worn down.

8OCT18|Wt:218|ATT:6|PAIN:1|NRG:7| Met w surgeon- update HERE.  Stage 3A- very winnable.  Glad to see the plan coming together.  Also looks like I will be ready for rodeo next year!

7OCT18|Wt:218|ATT:9|PAIN:1|NRG:8| Good day (not for the food truck though!) Great attitude and energy today.  Worked a little and then had some friends over & cooked a Mediterranean dinner.  Looking forward to the visit with the surgeon tomorrow and start getting a plan together.

6OCT18|Wt:217|ATT:7|PAIN:2|NRG:7| Pretty good day today.  13 hour day at work (a caterers life) and wore out towards the end with some weird pain, but made it through.

5OCT18|Wt:216|ATT:6|PAIN:2|NRG:5| CAT Scan today- rough morning emotionally, but the issue I had been dealing with passed and my attitude recovered. Busy weekend ahead at work. (Started tracking energy today.)

4OCT18|Wt:217|ATT:3|PAIN:4| Something is changing and my attitude crashed hard. Need to take control tomorrow!

3OCT18|Wt: 218|ATT:6|PAIN:2| Talked to a cancer survivor friend of mine today.  Health solid today but ended with just a crummy attitude.

2OCT18|Wt:220|ATT:8|PAIN:3| Things got stopped up last night which caused some pressure & discomfort today. Long work day.

1OCT18|Wt:219|ATT:8|PAIN:2| Confirmed CAT scan and Surgeon. Feel good, some pressure.

30SEP18|Wt:221|ATT:6|PAIN:3| Worked around house and on website.  Feel some pain.

29SEP18|Wt:220|ATT:8|PAIN:1| ATOCF at work- fatigued early but no pain.